Thirty

I guess this means you can’t trust me anymore, you gosh darn younger whippersnappers!

The first selfie of my thirties. (From Instagram)

The first selfie of my thirties. (From Instagram)

VIDEO TRANSCRIPT

Hello, Earthlings. Today is December 16th, 1984.

Wait. No, no that was thirty years ago.

Oh! I’m thirty today. That’s what’s happening right here. That’s what’s happening right now.

So I’m recording this quick little thing. I’m at my church’s community dinner.

I was actually working on a different video for today. I asked some people to contribute memories and such, y’know…impressions of me from over the years, from different times of my life.

And I, of course, true to form, waited until the eleventh hour to ask for these clips and so I’m still putting that video together. But I wanted to put something together real quick and just get this up, because…

I’m thirty today! My twenties are officially behind me and if the old sayings are to be trusted, today I am no longer to be trusted by the youth. Can’t trust anybody over thirty.

And I am supposed to either become a conservative or be considered brainless, because somebody said, I can’t remember who said it…but there’s a quote that says everybody who’s under thirty who’s a conservative has no heart, and anybody over thirty who’s a liberal has no brain.

So, yeah, I dunno. Or maybe I’m just in between, since all these things are, like, over thirty and under thirty. What about those of us who are, in fact, thirty? I don’t know.

This video is really going nowhere. But I just wanted to commemorate, with a video, this. This…this is happening.

I have left…I have left it behind. I’m not young anymore. And, uh…I have joined the ranks of the old people. Old people, I am one of you, now.

Young people, in your twenty-somethings and tweens, I have left you behind in the dust! I am ahead of you! I’m winning the…race? Oh, right, it’s not a race. Race to death!

Anyway, this is going nowhere. I just wanted to give everyone a happy season’s greetings, happy holidays, and a little celebration…the fact that it’s my birthday.

So until next time, I’m Adam the Alien. Fare thee well!

Writer. Actor. Director. Chalk artist. YouTuber. Nerdfighter. Traveler. Pansexual. Genderfluid. Millennial. Socialist. Living a complex life beyond those words.

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